It's National Infertility Awareness Week. Did you know that 1 in 8 couples struggle to conceive? Often times, people think asking a couple when they’re going to have a baby (or another baby) is a harmless question. What they don’t realize is that couple may have been trying to conceive unsuccessfully for months or even [...]
Category: Love ~ Loss ~ Grief
Vulnerability
As a bereaved mother and blogger, connecting with new people who haven’t walked a similar path creates a renewed sense of vulnerability. Everything I write about here is very personal. That was my intention when I first started writing about Elliot, my grief, and all the significant experiences that have followed. I spent the first [...]
Naming Elliot
I know I've already shared a little of the story behind this album and what it means to us. I listened to it this morning and wanted to share more. The night before the album release date was announced, I dreamed about a little girl. She was about 4-5 years old and had a full [...]
Saying My Piece
Last fall, a blog post written by a grieving mother was shared in the loss community. I haven’t looked at it since it was first shared, so I can’t quote it directly. Basically, it was about sharing pregnancy and birth announcements in pregnancy and infant loss support groups, and how hurtful those announcements can be. [...]
She’s Here
I am beyond happy and relieved to share that Brynn Josephine arrived safely in our arms via cesarean section on November 29th at 8:16am. She was 6lbs 9oz and 19 inches. Brynn is now 12 days old, and I can't believe how fast the time is passing already. She's brought us so much joy and [...]
How are you doing…really?
***Trigger warning - current pregnancy discussed.*** How are you doing...really? This is such a loaded question for any grieving parent, especially a mama pregnant after loss. I had just met with my high risk specialist and was trying to process everything we had talked about when E, my perinatal counselor/unofficial PAL advocate and support person, [...]
My Girls
**Trigger warning – current pregnancy discussed** As you may know, I am participating in Carly Marie’s Capture Your Grief Project for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month. So far, it’s going okay. I’ve decided not to step too far outside my comfort zone this year. I want to acknowledge my grief and protect my heart [...]
Peace of Mind, Peace of Heart
Last night, Ben and I found ourselves sitting outside Labor & Delivery waiting to be checked in, just as we had done 17 months earlier with Elliot. This was our first visit to L&D with Brynn. I’m relieved to tell you everything is okay. Yesterday morning started off great. I went to my weekly OB [...]
I’m Still a Grieving Mama
Sometimes, you just have to know when to admit you're not okay and then ask for help. I realized I reached a breaking point yesterday morning, as I fought back tears on my walk through the sea of strangers in the train station. Grief. Fear. Anxiety. Uncertainty. PTSD. How am I going to survive this pregnancy feeling [...]
15 Months
Today, Elliot turns 15 months old...in Heaven. It's so hard to believe it's been 15 months since Ben and I last held our baby girl. It's been 15 months since I kissed her cool cheeks and whispered I love you into her flawless little ears. It's been 15 months since we learned what true perfection looks like. [...]
Walking With Elliot 